I am starting to head completely off the radar with my search for the best golf ball. How the hell I ended up finding and then deciding to play the FOO-KING-LONG golf ball beats me.
Actually, I know. I went to Google and searched for “illegal golf balls” and “non-conforming golf balls”. One of the results which popped up was the FOO-KING-LONG.
You’re smart enough to translate its name into “a golf ball that goes fucking far”. You got that part.
And you have to appreciate the Marketing department. Look at the box and sleeve. Well played.
They admit to it being non-conforming and illegal. You won’t see any PGA Tour pros teeing one up as its not allowed sir.
And they’re not telling us what the illegal core is made out of that gives its “Ninja Like Ball Speed.” I looked. Not a mention of one scientific term anywhere. All we know is “Bandanas and Ninjas are not included” with each purchase. Let’s go with each golf ball is made with grounded up Chinese Throwing Stars.
But whats most important is finding out if the FOO-KING-LONG is a good golf ball. And that’s my specialty. It’s what I mostly do best. So that’s what I did.
Just like with all of my reviews I play one 18 hole round at Rackham Golf Course from the White Tees. I played this round on 7-6-18 with temperatures around 85 degrees, maybe an 8mph wind, and sunny skies.
Sending Driver – No bullshit – this is a very long golf ball. I hit the Mother FOO-KING Shit out of the FOO-KING-LONG all day with driver. I was ending up on parts of the fairway or even in the rough a good 5 to 20 yards further than I’ve ever been on Rackham. Like, all day, and stuff.
It started on the first hole. I’m still 265 yards out with my second shot but a 250 yard drive is pretty good for your boy. Especially since I do not warm up or stretch. Cold as ice on an 85 degree day. We don’t need to talk about the 3 wood I hit next into some tall grass on the left resulting in a lost ball.
On the Par 4 third hole I drove the ball through the dogleg left fairway which has happened before but is rare. Its at least 250 yards to the dog leg.
Not sure if its my furthest drive on the Par 4 fourth hole but it was definitely the most accurate AND furthest drive I’ve ever hit on this hole. Hit Pitching Wedge into the green from the fairway for the first time ever where typically I hit 8 or 9 iron.
And then absolutely hit the furthest drive I’ve ever hit on the Par 5 7th. This is a good 10 yards further than my drives with the TaylorMade TP5X and Nike PD Long. I know this to be true because those other golf balls stopped on the right side near a tree. Not so with the FOO-KING-LONG. It rolled right by it.
And another monster drive on the Par 4 12th. I’m about 75 yards out on this 333 yard long hole which puts me at a 258 yard drive. We don’t need to talk about me flubbing the approach into the left bunker.
To end off the day I hit a “no doubt about it” , “shoot the boot lock of the week” , “see you later” drive on number 18. Eighteen is the hardest hole on Rackham as it’s an uphill 431 yard Par 4. It’s a Par 5 for the hotties.
I typically end up 175 yards out and hit 3 or 5 wood into the green because the shot plays like its 220 yards. Not so today. Am right up next to the 150 yard marker. That’s at least a 276 yard drive. Your boy was pumped up. I hit an iron onto the green for the first time ever.
It should be noted I hit the fairway 4 times which is below average. Two times the FOO-KING-LONG rolled through the dogleg and was just off the fairway at least four times.
I also had to give myself a penalty stroke on #9 as my tee shot went a little left through the fairway and into the tall grass. This has happened before with the Vice Pro but the FOO-KING-LONG bounced into the shit at the end of the tall grass, not at the beginning.
Overall it was fairly accurate. Trajectory was mid to high and most of my drives went straight. No draws and no slices.
Fairway Woods & Hybrids – With me getting notably more distance with the FOO-KING-LONG off the tee it meant less fairway woods. Which is refreshing. I didn’t hit a hybrid all day either.
It was simply a day of advancing the ball down the fairway. Except for this one shot. Which is the only shot we will talk about. I referenced my tee shot on the Par 5 7th hole in the Sending Driver section.
This is a fairly long dogleg left hole with a small green and trees protecting the left side of the green and fairway. You have to hit one hell of a tee shot down the right side of the fairway to even have a shot at hitting the green in two. I’ve come up 15 yards short of the green a half a dozen times. Here is a picture of my tee shot.
You can see the 150 yard marker 80ish (100?…1000?) yards ahead putting me 230 yards out. You can’t feel the breeze at my left rear quarter but I’ll tell you that its rare to have the wind at your back on this hole. Not a lot of wind but maybe 5 mph.
Here I am thinking I’ve got a legitimate chance to get on the green in two because the FOO-KING-LONG did its job and went further down the fairway and into the best spot possible to hit the green.
Let’s FOO-KING send the 3 wood. And send it I did. As soon as it left the club I knew I made good contact. Starting it left with the wind gently pushing it to the right. I couldn’t tell where it ended up but I knew it was close.
Not even going to be mad about the FOO-KING-LONG ending up in the bunker. (Zoom into the tee shot picture you can see this bunker on the right front of the green) It splashed about 15 feet behind, took a jump, and rolled a few feet. It sailed the first quarter of the green in the air. That was every bit of a 230 yard shot in the air.
No matter which way you slice it this is a 502 yard hole and I got basically pin high in two shots. That has never happened with any other ball I’ve tested on this particular hole. Nice job FOO-KING-LONG.
Irons – Things got a little interesting here. Only had two Greens In Regulation with the FOO-KING-LONG which is way below average. And it’s because this golf ball was long. For the better part of the day my iron shots were going a full club length longer with the FOO-KING-LONG versus a conforming golf ball.
It did show off some backspin when I dropped this one in on the Par 4 4th hole from around 100 yards.
And it showed off its angry side with the 5 iron I hit into the Par 4 18th green after my personal best drive.
I just could not get the FOO-KING-LONG under control with the irons. It kind of reminded me of the XXIO in that it was a tank of a golf ball. It exploded off the iron but control and accuracy where not its strong parts.
Wedges – With me not hitting basically any Greens In Regulation it left me with a lot of chip and bunker shots. Results were mixed.
The FOO-KING-LONG did not check up once nor show any kind of spin with any chip I hit. This is not a good chipping ball for that reason.
Knowing there were not going to be surprises with chip shots meant I just needed to get it rolling which resulted in shots coming to rest close enough to the hole for me to have a legitimate chance at making a putt.
Putting – One 3 putt and 7 one putts for a total of 30 putts. Not bad but its a bit misleading. Plus I putted a number of shots off the green instead of using a wedge but those go down as chips, not putts.
A very firm but not rock hard response is what the FOO-KING-LONG makes with the putter. It rolled with purpose.
Durability – Sadly this was a day where I lost two golf balls. Rarely do I lose one. Good thing I brought two sleeves to the course. This one only has nine holes of play on it and barely a scratch. Definitely could get more rounds out of it.
Score – 85. GIR – 2. Putts – 30. Fairways – 4. Penalty Strokes – 2.
That 85 was a lot of work. Two penalty strokes because of lost balls. Played the Par 5’s 4 over. Zero birdies with 8 pars. Six of those pars were from scrambling. After sending driver and fairway woods the FOO-KING-LONG became a bit of job to get around the course.
Could it be I hit the crap out of it because I’d been a good boy and did not miss a day of the hybrid Body Beast workout I’ve been doing for the past month? Maybe.
Or could it be the FOO-KING-LONG is just a very long golf ball? Also maybe. Its claim of “When Long Just Isn’t Enough” might have some truth to it.
I do think there is something to this golf ball being long. There are days when I know I’m hitting well and it didn’t matter what golf ball I was playing. This was not one of those days. This golf ball just went.
I don’t see myself playing this golf ball on a regular basis but maybe the next time I am in a 4 man scramble I’ll give a sleeve to whomever on the team hits the longest and let them have a go at it.
For me it really comes back to was the FOO-KING-LONG fun to play? Kind of. Hitting long clubs was definitely fun but around the greens felt like work.
But it was funny as hell showing the golf ball to the guys I got paired up. Their faces were like “WTF is this?” There might have been some “Come on Mother FOO-KING” and “What the FOO-KING were you doing there?”
My favorite was when I sprayed my tee shot on the Par 5 14th into the 17th fairway. A guy who works at Rackham was on a break and joined us on that hole. He did not know I was playing the FOO-KING-LONG and asked me what I hit. He would get to the ball before me as he was in a cart and I was walking. I told him the FOO-KING-LONG.
He drove up to it, drove back, and said “there’s some fucking Chinese shit on that ball. Is that you?” As a matter of fact it is.
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